The night at ENIGMA was crazy.It has been so long since MY LAST drunk ,and that was about few months ago. ....i had taken 3 shots of tequila + 1 vodka *) and sips of heineken which was a mild one..cant imagine i can stil tahan ,but i did have the feeling walking in the clouds,heaviness of my head,talked craps and nonsense which i told myself repeatedly reminded myself subconsciously do not behave like a mad cow..at the end,i was worst than a mad cow,i laughed,talked and joked like nobody's business,as though im no longer myself. Yea,in fact ,i was not myself that night..\\
Back home2.30 am, drowsiness started,feeling of emptiness is all over, feel nothingness,headache ,palpitation and nausea came to visit me..die,was wondering i still have appointment with ryan at 9 AM..shit.. and i was drunk like hell now.. then i was totally unconscious ,lying dead on my bed without remove my watch,my smoked-smell shirt(u know after visited those pub,the smell),my contaminated jeans,my foul pair of socks,ring,bracelet,gone to dreamland with my pity braces that has not been brushed and rinse with listerine (the taste of tequila in it) ..awww.money and documents were still in the pocket..i cant imagine..
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i hate the knock-on effect of post alchohol consumption.

i hate the aftermath feeling whereby my mind has been beaten up by those emptiness and lonely feeling.

i hate myself for raised up a white flag to those fucking boozy drinks .

i keep on reminding myself --> no next time,it will be the final one..



(but who can predict huh?)



ps* i still love tequila.